WHY AWFUL CLIENTS ARE GREAT FOR YOUR BUSINESS.

Awful clients.

The ones that want you to give them everything, at the highest quality, but then nickel & dime the budget. The ones that hire you to do a job but don't trust you to actually DO the job. The ones who won't acknowledge that they don't know what the hell they want. The I-already-know-how-this-works-because-I've done-this-before people (except that they don't know how it works) and the can-you-do-it for-cheaper? folks. Ridiculous turnaround times, unrealistic expectations, clients who think they can do your job better than you, & clients who just want to use you for your resources--these folks can quickly become an entrepreneur's worst nightmare.

Whether you're a Photographer, Graphic Designer, Personal Trainer, Copywriter, Fashion Stylist, Videographer, Baker, Producer, PR guru, Interior Designer or any other kind of creative business owner, you'll probably encounter one of these people at some point during the life of your business. Do I hope that they never--EVER--cross your path? Of course. But the reality is that they probably WILL show up along your entrepreneurial journey because they're there to teach you how to show up more fully in your business. Knowing them will raise your blood pressure, create tons of physical stress & almost make you were sitting in an office cubicle instead of crafting a career you love...but these people can be really great for your business if you can learn what they're really trying to teach you.Let me explain.

Over the course of my 5.5 years in design, I've probably had 3 clients who I'd put in the no-matter-what-happens-please-absolutely-never-ever-call-my-line-again category. Some as recently as 2015. With two of the projects there came a point where I thought, "there's not enough money you could pay me that would make this a pleasant-enough experience to continue"--too many changes to the scope, too many fluxuations in the budget & not enough trust to execute the project in a way that would make this collaborative design process fun. And for awhile I did what we normally do in these cases--complain to family & close friends about what an absolute hemorrhoid these people had become. But that quickly got old. And I knew deep down that they weren't just there to get on my nerves but that they (and my experiences with them) could teach me something, if I changed my perspective.Because all the "awful clients" are really doing is showing you where you need to "tighten up" in your biz--where you need to be more specific in your contracts, raise your prices, eliminate some services or set clearer personal & professional boundaries.

So I did. And here's what I realized: that in the beginning of my career, as a fresh & bright-eyed designer, I'd constructed an ideal client profile that consisted of something like this: Good eye.Great budget. And that was pretty much it. What I most wanted were clients with a good eye for design who'd let me execute my vision + a sufficient-enough budget ($10k & up) with which to execute said design. They should "benice", "be cool" and "be flexible". And when I found those people, I was straight up overjoyed. But now that I've had time to develop as a designer, expand my professional interests, work with a variety of clients & grow as a person (read: I've acquired some skin in the game),that short list doesn't cut it anymore.Not if I intend to continue doing work I love, for people I love working with.

Here's the invaluable insight The Awfuls have helped me realize: I'm no longer willing to settle for clients with just "good money & good style" and I can no longer focus on the traditional quantitative demographics like age, education level, marital status, family makeup & income level to identify the people I most want to work with(categories we entrepreneurs are traditionally taught to use). Instead, I've shifted to a Values-Based Client Profilewhich means I care more about WHO my clients are and what THEY value then what they're bringing to the table.TheAwfuls have schooled me on this:  My ideal/targeted clients are people with a high level of personal integrity--ones who take responsibility for their behavior. They're people who value my time as a professional & who understand that Interior Design is a professional luxury service. These people trust the process of design and understand that there's no one size fits all design approach. My ideal clients believe in the importance of self-care & view the creation of a beautiful home as an extension of their well-being. They communicate authentically, are decisive, have a great sense of humor & genuinely want to work with a designer. Do I still want them to have a stylish eye & enough of a budget to execute their wishes? Absolutely. But I don't worry about those things because they're encompassed within the values/standards I set regarding the people I want to work with. Because someone who understands that Interior Design is a professional luxury service would never belittle me or themselves by asking me to render a service for less than it's value. Someone who really wants to work with a designer will give me the freedom & trust to work my magic and create something jaw dropping for them. Someone with a high level of personal integrity is honest about their budget upfront. See what I mean?

Here's another example: If you're an "artisanal croissant maker", your client is not "anyone who can afford $2.25 for a piece of bread". It's someone who LOVES a delicious buttery & flakey croissant. Someone who will find a bakeshop they love & drive 20 minutes clear across town on a Sunday morning to read the New York Times & have a croissant because it's their "thing"--an act of self-love. It's someone who believes in the value of knowing where their food comes from. High quality butter.Locally grown ingredients. Developing relationships with the people who make their food. A person who believes that not just anyone can make "good bread".  If you're a croissant artisan or specialty bread maker, your clients are not "anybody who will buy a croissant"--you want the people who appreciate the value of the service you're providing. And if you really love what you do, you should want the same thing, too.

I'm not implying that when you encounter The Awfuls that it automatically means you need better people--that was just one of my lessons. I've also learned that if I have a misunderstanding with a client it's probably a sign that I need to update my contract & make sure the major details are in writing. And I've learned that I needed to stop giving clients discounts that they didn't ask for because giving without explaining the true value of the discount means they won't understand the value of the service they're receiving. And because of that, they will ride me bareback (not to mention that clients who want a discount should AT LEAST have the balls to ask for one).  Because I've had the ability to create my own path, I intend to work with the kind of people I genuinely want to be around. Think about these questions with regard to your biz: For whom are you making your product? How do you want your clients to interact with YOU? Who do you want them to be in their personal lives? What does investing in your product mean that they value?? I NEVER would this kind of clarity about my business & my tribe if it hadn't been for The Awfuls. When I got fed up enough & realized I never wanted to work with those kind of people again, it gave me the push to figure out the kind of people I DO want to work with, which has made all the difference. And it's also why I don't really believe in "awful clients"--I just see them as the guides who show us where we aren't in alignment with who we really are & what we really want. All they're really here to do is point you towards greater happiness....so acknowledge what you need to change & go change it. 'Cause your best work is still waiting for you.

DAYKA...AL ROKER...AND MY FIRST LIVE, NATIONAL TV INTERVIEW--EVER!

Deep inside, I've always known that TV was in the cards for me.

As I became more confident in my abilities & established some bigger dreams, it started to become clear that it's the next logical, progressive step along my path. 

I've been offered two opportunities in years past and received emails from a few producers requesting casting videos, but I either didn't make the final cut or it was for something I've always shied away from--a competition-style show. 

Because I've been able to get a good amount of behind-the-scenes production work under my belt, both from my days as a Design Assistant on the show Movie & A Makeover (Turner Broadcasting) and from the last few years through my work with Flynnside Out, I'm clear that my ideal situation is being in front of the camera as an expert. There are so many uncontrollable things that happen behind the scenes that the viewer never sees--budgets disappear, parameters change, etc, but all you end up seeing in the end is an ugly room--no thanks. There's nothing wrong with the competition premise in general, but also I understand my personality enough to know that it probably won't play well in those circumstances--I've been told I have a case of RBF (Resting Bitch Face), I'm often a little heavy on the sarcasm & I absolutely enjoy a raunchy comment (or two!) every now & then. In TV land, this is either a recipe for disaster or the makings of great drama...depending on who's doing the interpreting! 

So it shouldn't come as a surprise to you when I say that getting booked as a guest expert on the Wake Up With Al morning show (The Weather Channel) was right up my alley--the exact thing kind of thing I've been wanting to do. It may be a surprise to you, however, to learn that 3 minutes after the opportunity was extended to to me...I got scared, y'all!! I immediately said yes but my mind was all, "What have you done???", once I started thinking about the parameters of live tv & how there's no editing. Then all of the dreaded "what-ifs" started popping up:
What if I trip over my feet, grab the table for balance & pull it down with me??
What if I get all tongue tied as I'm speaking, can't get my words out & just go into blank zone???
   Or better yet, What if I drop my beloved F-bomb in an off-the-cuff moment??
YIKES. All very scary scenarios.
But as much as fearful dayka was saying no (little d), I had this other voice in my heart that was all, "Go girl...you know you got this!" (said in my Mom's tone), so of course there was no turning back. 

Not only because I believe we have to run towards the things we're afraid of, but also because it was true--I am/was equipped for this!!

And in the end, this first-timer couldn't have asked for a better outcome.

The thing about live TV is this--the only way for you to get better at doing live TV is to actually DO live TV....I don't think there's any other way to simulate this kind of experience. After my fantastic producer Michael discussed the parameters of the segment with me, I pitched 10 ideas and he narrowed it down to the ones he liked the best/thought were the best fit for their content (weather-related upcycle & recycle projects). I actually prepared 6 projects, we narrowed it down to 5 when I arrived Wednesday morning, and then during my segment, Al actually skipped over the recycled umbrella bag (which was fantastic, btw), so I only ended up presenting 4 of my projects which worked perfect for my 2.5 minutes. I had a bit of anxiety Monday & Tuesday morning but by the time I settled in Tuesday evening and carved out some quiet space, I was feeling confident and great...which lasted right up until we were about 15 seconds out and my stomach went all haywire. I was telling myself, "Don't you even do this shit, Dayka. Not now." and that was all I needed to pull it together--ha! All in all, my 2.5 minutes went off without a hitch (of course there are a few things I could nitpick, but I won't) and I'm pretty proud of this segment! Sam Champion--formerly of GMA and now host of his own show, AMHQ--and I were in makeup together so we had a chance to chat for a bit  which was very cool--such a great guy to be around (with a body to match!).

And AL ROKER!!!!

Totally just as warm & pleasant as you would expect. And Stephanie Abrams, his cohost, is hilarious--I can see why they make a great team. 

 I was able to stay in the studio for a bit around my segment and watching Al work is incredible...and so mind blowing to find myself in the same studio with an icon that I grew up with every morning, not only watching him do his thing in person but being interviewed by him as well!! 
I seriously wanted to pinch myself.
I can only imagine the grind of getting up at 3am daily (and having to go to bed very early, I imagine), but they both made it look effortless.
 I'm believing my skills will be much the same one day, too (and soon)!

So if you have a moment, take 2 minutes to watch my first, live national tv guest spot ever with none other than Al Roker himself. I wrote a blog post a few days ago where I mentioned just saying yes and thinking of your fear like a lion, only to get right up to it and see that it's just a tabby cat. 

This was one of those times, for sure, and it's funny to see how I wrote that just days before, not knowing that this opportunity was just around the corner.
Essentially I was talking to myself.
I was nervous, I won't lie, but when the cameras went live, your girl was ready to go.

 And now that I've got this one under my belt, I'm really excited about doing this again--I loved every minute.

http://www.weather.com/tv/shows/wake-up-with-al/video/recycling-repurposing-demo

AN 8 PAGE SPREAD IN SOUTHERN HOME...FEATURING YOURS TRULY!!

On the list of cool things that have happened to & for me since I started my business 4 years ago, this ranks up there at the very top--definitely a milestone. 

My first bit of press is out for 2015 and it's a huge deal for me--AN 8 PAGE FEATURE IN A NATIONAL MAGAZINE!!!! And I don't mean me and someone else on the same page, I mean page after page of yours truly in a story on my home here in Atlanta.

When an editor of Fresh Style magazine and its sister publication, Southern Lady, reached out back in November 2014 to profile me for this piece, my first thought was "no" because like most designers, my house isn't exactly how I want it to be. Still, I knew I'd be crazy to pass up the opportunity and got busy prepping my place for the team's arrival from Alabama. I'm used to working with my own photographers (or ones I know well) so it's rare that I don't see images before something gets published. In this case I didn't see anything with exception of the headshot pics they took of me, so I had zero idea of what to expect when it hit newsstands. When I finally found the magazine in the grocery store, I was in awe of how beautiful the photos were....and blown away by the size of the feature!

(pages aren't in order)

Seriously overjoyed!!

My house, as you can see, is done in a palette mainly consisting of black, white, brown & gold with a few pops of color, texture and pattern throughout. I really do LOVE color, but when I finally started getting around to addressing my home I found myself getting color confused (too many choices as a designer!) or the things I really obsessed over were a bit beyond what I wanted to spend, so I went with the palette of all of the things I most love to wear (which is a great place to start your design, btw!). This strategy also worked well for me because I tend to like spaces that feel warm & enveloping, so I'm a huge fan of darker colors and cozy rooms--and when I pull those blackout drapes closed in the living room, I feel like I'm in a cocoon on a planet far away.
Mission accomplished. 

Most of what you see here is vintage. The sofa & dining table are the only things that I purchased brand new almost 10 years ago...and both of them are hopefully on their way out soon! A few years back I mentioned in a blog post that I wanted the majority of the pieces in my home to be secondhand and fast forward a few years later and it's safe to say I'm around the 95% mark! The only other piece of furniture that I purchased brand new was my mattress--every other piece in my house is either from a thrift store, estate sale, yard sale or something similar, and it's all been refinished and reupholstered within an inch of its life! But I wouldn't change a thing about my choice to go that route. I pretty much love (almost) everything in here and when I DO tire of something, I have no qualms about letting it go on to its next life because my investment hasn't been outrageous. And more importantly, I know how good it feels to live with things you love. I'm grateful I can say that.

So if this is feature any indication of what 2015 will be for me, I am expecting to constantly have my mind blown this year, both personally and professionally.
And am I'm very much looking forward to every.single.bit of it.
And so it is.

IT'S MY ANNIVERSARY PART II: THE ONLY 2 THINGS YOU NEED TO START & SUCCEED IN BUSINESS

In the midst of writing Part I, the wheels in my head started spinning with practical tips I could share with you if find yourself dreaming of starting a new biz or moving to the next level with your current one. Lots of specifics crossed my mind, but as I though of nuggets that would hold true across any industry, there were 2 major things that stood out to me.

Can it really be that simple--only two things??
Yup, it is.

I don't care what industry you're in, or how old you are, if you're looking to launch a new business there are really only 2 things you're really going to need in abundance.

pic via Angela Murry Morris 

Confidence & Faith.

Everyone thinks money is the holy grail--and don't get me wrong, it helps A LOT--but here's the thing:  there are many a problem that an abundance of money can't solve.
A fool-proof business plan? A dream business partner? A can't-fail marketing strategy?
All fine & dandy, but none of these things can take the place of good ol' confidence & faith.

Confidence: There's a video that's been floating around the web for years now, and it features a curly haired little girl dancing on top of a vanity in the bathroom mirror full of gratitude for every little thing & telling herself how wonderful she is (see it here).  It's a great video...all of us really should wake up reminding ourselves of our utter wonderfulness everyday. But the reality is that you're gonna have those days where you wonder if you're good enough.
If your work is solid. 
If people like you OR your business. 
If you're doing the right thing. 
If anyone is reading what you wrote. 
Maybe even if you're a fool for choosing your career path.
(yes, sometimes on this road you'll be really unkind to yourself, too)

pic via Christina Wedge for DRD

The confidence you'll need to develop isn't for those fantastic days when you'll feel like Olivia Pope, walking across the White House lawn in 6" stilettos, taking names & solving the crises of the world in 45 minutes. It's actually for those OTHER days....when you think that your parents (partner/friend/teacher/etc) might have been right and maybe you should go get a "real job" instead of trying to make your dream work.
When it seems like your endeavor isn't a novel idea after all.
When you feel all lost, overwhelmed and unsure about which way to go...so you kinda just want to give up instead.

The truth is, no one is really gonna be able to pull you out of those shitty spots but you.
Being successful in business really means finding your voice and expressing it, but you can't do that without a shot of confidence...because in being you & expressing your unique voice, there will inevitably be something you'll want to say or do one day that will go against the grain. And the main thing you need to go against the grain is, you guessed it--confidence.
(or as I like to say "balls"--even though my mom hates when I say that)

Faith: Although I believe in God, I'm not saying you have to. What I am saying is this:
 you need to be very clear about your fundamental belief on how you think the world works...and if it's not a positive set of beliefs, you might as well stop now. Because trust me--as you move & grow in your business, you'll come across enough reasons to doubt yourself or think something isn't possible without adding a negative world view into the mix. I believe that the circle you create/world you live in is merely a reflection of what you believe about other people and the world as a whole, so if you're one of those conspiracy theory/everyone-is-out-to-get-me/no-one-is-ever-on-my-side/nothing-ever-works-out-for-me kinda people, please let me help you save your hard earned dollars--just stop, now. Do not try to start a business unless you're selling said conspiracy theory (in that case, it's a perfect fit!)--you're better off finding something else to spend your money on.
Because there WILL be late nights of "why??" and early mornings of "how??" and if you don't have a fundamental world view (or belief in God) that says something like "good will always triumph" or "I'll never miss anything that is truly for me" or "the Universe is always conspiring in my favor", then chiiiile...you are gonna have a tough time. Because it's never "if" those days come but "when" they come. And when they do, you need to have something to stand on that keeps you moving forward when you're doubting yourself and it's too dark to see the light at the end of the tunnel. 
So develop a belief system that supports you and I promise...you'll find yourself supported.

When people talk about how much being an entrepreneur has changed them, I think this is really what they're talking about. That no matter the industry, what changes who you are the most is going through each of these phases & uncovering that thing that we all have deep inside to push us forward to the other end--at least I know this is what I mean.
Each time you beat back your doubts, you win.
Each time you take a chance on your intuition and see that it was right, you get stronger.
Each time you remind yourself that "no matter what it looks like right now, all is well", you grow.
Each time you go against your gut, get burned but keep moving anyhow...you STILL win .

And this is how being a business owner can change the very core of who you are.
You might not always get it right, your idea may not make a gazillion dollars, you might stick your foot in your mouth more times than you'd care to, and you may never become a commercial success (whatever that means to you), BUT...if you can just believe that you're on the right path and have some faith that everything is ultimately working out for your good in spite of the details, you can always rest assured of one thing.

You'll end up winning anyhow.

(And PS--if you have a husband/girlfriend/lover/partner that isn't supportive of your dreams, you need to exit stage left IMMEDIATELY...and you probably don't need me to tell you this. Going this road is hard enough without the support of your intimate circle. If you're in bed with someone who doesn't support you...you should think about what you're really telling yourself about what you deserve).