THE TRUTH ABOUT MY WORK & HOW IT’S CHANGING.

I’ve been hiding something I need to be honest about.
For the past 10 months I haven’t really been telling the full, unadulterated truth.
Partly because I thought I needed to ease myself into it.
Partly because I was waiting for more answers.
Mostly because it’s another turning point in my life…and turning points can feel scary. It’s just so much easier to keep going forward when you think you know exactly what the road ahead holds.

But of course, that's some straight up bullshit 'cause we NEVER really know about the journey ahead with absolute certainty.
And now I've come to the point where the thought of staying still right where I am is more uncomfortable than the thought of just saying what needs to be said.

So here's my truth:

I love interior design.
I believe the real impact of design is much deeper than beautiful drapery & rich pillows & imported rugs & handmade tiles...but I love those aspects of it too.
I love how it feels to create spaces that make people say, "This is exactly what I wanted, I just didn't know how to tell you."
I love that I've made a space for myself out of thin air. I didn't fill someone's job description and what I'm doing--who I am + HOW I'm doing it--didn't exist until I was born. I'm pretty damn proud of that.
Hear me again: MY BUSINESS LITERALLY DIDN'T EXIST UNTIL I CREATED IT.
I love that I've been able to make a name for myself as a designer--that people have found value in the service I provide and that I've created work I can take pride in. I've designed amazing things with great companies and been exposed to some opportunities that I never, ever imagined myself having.

I like design a lot. I'll even say that I love design. But I'm not obsessed with it. 

I don't think about the blind spots to my design approach while I'm driving around.
I don't obsessively read every design book by every famous designer that's ever been published because I don't even own most of them. Matter of fact, I couldn't really care less.
My design magazines come in the mail and pile up for months because I don't immediately devour them to make style notebooks like I used to in the early days.
I no longer aim to fill my calendar with every single design event in Atlanta.
I don't care to stay in the know on all of the design blogger news and professional industry "scuttlebutt".
Something indeed, has shifted.
I like design. I even love design. But I'm just not there anymore. I've grown.
 

I know without a doubt that my greatest work is the work that is yet ahead of me--the work that's been waiting ever so patiently to be created. It revolves around Personal Empowerment, Personal Responsibility, Honesty, Authenticity and specifically, the Empowerment of Women (it's some serious work--it needs to be capitalized).

I think about it all of the time. 
I read about it all of the time.
I talk about it all of the time. (if you've ever had more than a 30 minute conversation with me, you can vouch for this!)
I write about it.
I post on social media about it.
I unpack it endlessly with my closest friends. 
We could be talking about a combination of your medical history, a 1964 Mustang, the weather in Istanbul & the benefits of Kale as a super green and I promise you--somehow, someway, I will bring that conversation back to Personal Empowerment. It's just how my mind makes sense of the world.
 
Telling the truth. Owning your own shit. Self care. Making empowering decisions. Personal responsibility. THESE are the things I want to spend my life working on.

I want to speak to groups, conferences & students about to remind them that Personal Power is a Personal Job. Coach women on uncovering & staying in alignment with their deepest values. Write books on how & the why. Host retreats for women creating authentic connections & empowered lives. Author articles. And boldly explore the corners of this world both on my own & with groups of courageous women. Annnnnndddddd....you know what??
I want to design some beautiful spaces here & there, too.
A few super cool projects every year for wonderful, bad ass clients with great budgets who love me, love my approach and TRUST me to do my thing.

Wait--did you expect me to say I was quitting design?? 
 

No--that's not exactly where I was going with this.
It's more about being radically honest with myself AND with you. And to serve as your personal reminder that life WILL change...and when it does it's so much easier to go where it is taking you than to fight against it. Nine times out of ten it will lead you to the place you most want to be anyhow, you just don't know it in this moment. So just relax & go with the flow. Trust me on this.

Yes, I still want to take on some design projects, but I'm looking for the RIGHT people and the RIGHT projects.
Cool projects, good budgets, funny, fun, quirky, interesting people...the kind of folks that carry their own pixie dust and know it.

And since I'm being so honest, let me just keep it 1000: 

It takes courage to turn business away when a glance at your bank statement reminds you that the easy way out is to betray yourself & just take the money anyway. It's one thing to talk about taking a stand for yourself & ONLY doing work you really love with people you really want to work with but....actually doing it?? This is a completely different ballgame, my friends. It's scary and empowering. Crazy and commendable. The kinda work that will put a bit of hair on your chest. There's no husband, partner, or sugar daddy over here to share the load--just me by myself (and God!) doing the very best I can to make it happen. Every.single.day. Me & my ballsy self.

Getting clear about your values, about who you are and then living in a way that conveys personal integrity is at the very core of sharing this publicly. Showing up for MYSELF. Making sure that who I ACTUALLY AM and who I SAY I AM are the exact same woman. This is some boss work, my friends, and while it may not be for everybody.....

IT IS FOR ME.

THIS IS MY JOURNEY.

So here's what I'm looking for:

If you're in need of design services--residential design, commercial design or brand -- you've got a few dollars to spend and *you're super cool, I'd love to hear from you. It could be a small project, a big project, a production project--but it must be interesting. Let's do something bold and have fun! You should be ready & willing to hire a designer and most importantly, you should want to work with ME, specifically. If you fit the bill, just reply to this email and let's see how we can create magic together.

If you are a woman who could use a little bit of my Personal Empowerment pixie dust--who's ready to evolve to the next level but isn't quite sure how to do it, who knows you've got some blind spots & you're ready face them head on, I'd LOVE to hear from you. I'd love to work with you and help you learn how to empower YOURSELF in a way that feels right for you. No more stories about him. About her. About what happened. About why it sucked. About why the business isn't working. About why you can't do whatever it is that you know you're supposed to be doing right now. Just you--right where you are, right here & right now--and me together, working together to move you forward into who you KNOW you're destined to be. If I'm talking to you, please drop me a line (reply to this email). I would LOVE to work with you. L.O.V.E. And if you're not sure that I'm talking to you, here's how to know: if you're reading this and getting a tingle then yeah, I'm talking to you. When you know that you know, you KNOW.

In the meantime, thank you for your support. For reading my words & sharing them with your friends, for hiring me to design your most intimate spaces & for always, aways ALWAYS cheering me on. It means more than I could ever adequately express.
 
Trust me when I say this is only the beginning.

**And FYI, you cannot vouch for your own cool factor--someone must have actually TOLD YOU that you were cool. Folk need to be vetted!! ;-) **

Xo,
d.

WHY AWFUL CLIENTS ARE GREAT FOR YOUR BUSINESS.

Awful clients.

The ones that want you to give them everything, at the highest quality, but then nickel & dime the budget. The ones that hire you to do a job but don't trust you to actually DO the job. The ones who won't acknowledge that they don't know what the hell they want. The I-already-know-how-this-works-because-I've done-this-before people (except that they don't know how it works) and the can-you-do-it for-cheaper? folks. Ridiculous turnaround times, unrealistic expectations, clients who think they can do your job better than you, & clients who just want to use you for your resources--these folks can quickly become an entrepreneur's worst nightmare.

Whether you're a Photographer, Graphic Designer, Personal Trainer, Copywriter, Fashion Stylist, Videographer, Baker, Producer, PR guru, Interior Designer or any other kind of creative business owner, you'll probably encounter one of these people at some point during the life of your business. Do I hope that they never--EVER--cross your path? Of course. But the reality is that they probably WILL show up along your entrepreneurial journey because they're there to teach you how to show up more fully in your business. Knowing them will raise your blood pressure, create tons of physical stress & almost make you were sitting in an office cubicle instead of crafting a career you love...but these people can be really great for your business if you can learn what they're really trying to teach you.Let me explain.

Over the course of my 5.5 years in design, I've probably had 3 clients who I'd put in the no-matter-what-happens-please-absolutely-never-ever-call-my-line-again category. Some as recently as 2015. With two of the projects there came a point where I thought, "there's not enough money you could pay me that would make this a pleasant-enough experience to continue"--too many changes to the scope, too many fluxuations in the budget & not enough trust to execute the project in a way that would make this collaborative design process fun. And for awhile I did what we normally do in these cases--complain to family & close friends about what an absolute hemorrhoid these people had become. But that quickly got old. And I knew deep down that they weren't just there to get on my nerves but that they (and my experiences with them) could teach me something, if I changed my perspective.Because all the "awful clients" are really doing is showing you where you need to "tighten up" in your biz--where you need to be more specific in your contracts, raise your prices, eliminate some services or set clearer personal & professional boundaries.

So I did. And here's what I realized: that in the beginning of my career, as a fresh & bright-eyed designer, I'd constructed an ideal client profile that consisted of something like this: Good eye.Great budget. And that was pretty much it. What I most wanted were clients with a good eye for design who'd let me execute my vision + a sufficient-enough budget ($10k & up) with which to execute said design. They should "benice", "be cool" and "be flexible". And when I found those people, I was straight up overjoyed. But now that I've had time to develop as a designer, expand my professional interests, work with a variety of clients & grow as a person (read: I've acquired some skin in the game),that short list doesn't cut it anymore.Not if I intend to continue doing work I love, for people I love working with.

Here's the invaluable insight The Awfuls have helped me realize: I'm no longer willing to settle for clients with just "good money & good style" and I can no longer focus on the traditional quantitative demographics like age, education level, marital status, family makeup & income level to identify the people I most want to work with(categories we entrepreneurs are traditionally taught to use). Instead, I've shifted to a Values-Based Client Profilewhich means I care more about WHO my clients are and what THEY value then what they're bringing to the table.TheAwfuls have schooled me on this:  My ideal/targeted clients are people with a high level of personal integrity--ones who take responsibility for their behavior. They're people who value my time as a professional & who understand that Interior Design is a professional luxury service. These people trust the process of design and understand that there's no one size fits all design approach. My ideal clients believe in the importance of self-care & view the creation of a beautiful home as an extension of their well-being. They communicate authentically, are decisive, have a great sense of humor & genuinely want to work with a designer. Do I still want them to have a stylish eye & enough of a budget to execute their wishes? Absolutely. But I don't worry about those things because they're encompassed within the values/standards I set regarding the people I want to work with. Because someone who understands that Interior Design is a professional luxury service would never belittle me or themselves by asking me to render a service for less than it's value. Someone who really wants to work with a designer will give me the freedom & trust to work my magic and create something jaw dropping for them. Someone with a high level of personal integrity is honest about their budget upfront. See what I mean?

Here's another example: If you're an "artisanal croissant maker", your client is not "anyone who can afford $2.25 for a piece of bread". It's someone who LOVES a delicious buttery & flakey croissant. Someone who will find a bakeshop they love & drive 20 minutes clear across town on a Sunday morning to read the New York Times & have a croissant because it's their "thing"--an act of self-love. It's someone who believes in the value of knowing where their food comes from. High quality butter.Locally grown ingredients. Developing relationships with the people who make their food. A person who believes that not just anyone can make "good bread".  If you're a croissant artisan or specialty bread maker, your clients are not "anybody who will buy a croissant"--you want the people who appreciate the value of the service you're providing. And if you really love what you do, you should want the same thing, too.

I'm not implying that when you encounter The Awfuls that it automatically means you need better people--that was just one of my lessons. I've also learned that if I have a misunderstanding with a client it's probably a sign that I need to update my contract & make sure the major details are in writing. And I've learned that I needed to stop giving clients discounts that they didn't ask for because giving without explaining the true value of the discount means they won't understand the value of the service they're receiving. And because of that, they will ride me bareback (not to mention that clients who want a discount should AT LEAST have the balls to ask for one).  Because I've had the ability to create my own path, I intend to work with the kind of people I genuinely want to be around. Think about these questions with regard to your biz: For whom are you making your product? How do you want your clients to interact with YOU? Who do you want them to be in their personal lives? What does investing in your product mean that they value?? I NEVER would this kind of clarity about my business & my tribe if it hadn't been for The Awfuls. When I got fed up enough & realized I never wanted to work with those kind of people again, it gave me the push to figure out the kind of people I DO want to work with, which has made all the difference. And it's also why I don't really believe in "awful clients"--I just see them as the guides who show us where we aren't in alignment with who we really are & what we really want. All they're really here to do is point you towards greater happiness....so acknowledge what you need to change & go change it. 'Cause your best work is still waiting for you.

ALL ABOUT BALI...AND I'M LAUNCHING A PODCAST!

I'm back....and with exciting news!

But before I get to that, let me start with what you REALLY wanna know. Bali was indeed a trip for the memory vault. It stretched me in so many ways (different from my trip to Istanbul) and so much of what I learned will benefit me not only as I continue to travel more & more, but as I take increasingly broader steps in life. It was different than I expected: the flight was no joke (OMG, my feet swelled so bad on the flight over/flight back, yikes), the weather was H.O.T and the wifi was spotty but I met some incredibly inspiring souls, had some of the most deep & insightful conversations, saw a really beautiful (really beautiful) man for about 15 minutes ANNNDD got to experience an extended layover in Seoul, Korea (Omg, I still can't believe that I WENT TO BALI!!!). There were so many lessons & stories (plus a few attitude adjustments for me!) and though I tried to share a good amount through my Instagram & Facebook pages, it was impossible to get it all out so......I'm launching a podcast!!!

Dayka Robinson's Powercast Logo

It's called The Powercast with Dayka Robinson and is all about claiming your power + lessons on love, life entrepreneurship and beyond. This has been something I've wanted to do for awhile & my trip to Bali set up the perfect opportunity to launch with the telling of some of my stories and experiences there. The first episode is all about my Lessons From Bali and is perfect for anyone who wants to know more about my experiences on the island during my 2.5 week vacation and the powerful lessons I learned from traveling solo to Indonesia. And if you just wanna know more about how I think in general, this will give you some insight. Hearing people talk about their experiences is so different than reading about them so I hope you'll enjoy this new format--it's going live tomorrow! 

So in lieu of a long blogpost and in preparation for the podcast, here are a few pics & stories from my travels...

Dayka Robinson Bali Solo Travel Ubud 2016-10

It took me 28.5 hours of flying time to get to Bali--and that doesn't include my airport layover time! Atl to Washington DC, DC to NYC, NYC to LAX, LAX to Sydney, Sydney to Denpasar, Bali. Sound crazy? You're right...but then again, so was the price of my roundtrip airline ticket! You'll have to listen to my podcast to find exactly how much I paid (jaw-dropping)!

Dayka Robinson Bali Solo Travel Ubud 2016-4

Dayka Robinson Bali Solo International Black Woman Travel Ubud Sticky Rice 2016

Dayka Robinson Bali Woman Solo International Black Woman Travel Ubud 2016 Paradise

Dayka Robinson Bali Solo Travel Ubud 2016-11

Stacie, the friend I was linked with by my beloved college roommate. We immediately had a connection & hit it off like old girlfriends (and we talked about this podcast, too. Hey Stacie!)! I would've been perfectly fine on my own, but I'm SO GLAD I was able to meet a great friend and have someone on the same path

to break bread with during my trip. A welcomed surprise indeed!

Dayka Robinson Indonesia Bali Ubud Solo International Travel Black Woman 2016 Fruit Salad

Breakfast with fruit salad EVERY morning!

Dayka Robinson Bali Black Woman Solo International Black Woman Travel Ubud Daily Offering Balinese 2016

The Balinese put out offerings with incense twice a day (maybe more?) so you see these on the ground everywhere you go--homes, restaurants, retail shops, temples, etc. It's considered extremely disrespectful to step on one so in addition to maneuvering through the crowded sidewalk traffic and watching out for motorbike & cars (especially when I'm accustomed to the other side of the road), you have to watch where you step, too! Still, I loved the signs of daily devotion everywhere I went.

Dayka Robinson Bali Woman Solo International Black Woman Travel Ubud Paradise Room 2016

There are 3 places for guests to rent at this residence and I stayed in 2 of them (Click here to see this AirBNB listing and here to see the 1 bedroom). The breakfast was delish (and so filling), the infinity pool was gorg (deeper than most you'll find on the island) and the owners dropped me off wherever I wanted to go in town which easily saved about $10 USD each day ($5 going, $5 back). Ooh. And they also, they made these soyabean patties for breakfast that were so yum...I'll be on the lookout for those here. $30/night for this little gem (plus tasty local treats restocked each day!). 

Dayka Robinson Bali Black Woman Solo International Black Woman Travel Ubud Moneky Forrest 2016

The infamous Monkey Forrest. Do you follow me on Instagram?? If not, you'll want to head over to hear the background (and see the pics!) from this story. One & done for me!

Dayka Robinson Bali Black Woman Solo International Black Woman Travel Ubud Nyepi 2016

Dayka Robinson Bali Indonesia Solo Travel Black Woman 2016

A pic from the 3rd place I stayed (see my Air BNB accommodation here). Breakfast every morning on this patio overlooking the rice paddies & a wonderful candlelight lunch/dinner on Nyepi 2016. Loved this place!

Dayka Robinson Bali Woman Solo International Black Woman Travel Baliense Temple Ubud 2016

Dayka Robinson Bali 2016-1

I found the most wonderful place to stay when I first made it to the island. When I'm searching for places on Air BNB I tend to save a ton of places to my wish list and then pay attention to the ones that keep drawing me in. There was a reason that this one kept coming up for me...it ended up being the perfect place to start my journey. (See more here) 

Dayka Robinson Bali Black Woman Solo International Black Woman Travel Ubud Dr. Melva Green 2016

Dr. Melva Green from A&E's Hoarders. She's a friend of a friend and lives in Bali part time so we were able to link up during my time on the island as well. Kismet!

Dayka Robinson Bali Black Woman Solo International Black Woman Travel Ubud 2016-2

Dayka Robinson Bali Black Woman Solo International Black Woman Travel Ubud Ogoh Ogoh parade Nyepi 2016

Ogoh Ogoh preparations for Nyepi Day 2016...

Dayka Robinson Bali Solo Travel Ubud 2016-2

The site of the famous Luwak coffee "plantation". I'm not a coffee drinker, but the taste is supposed to be incredible and get this....it'smade from the poo-poo of the Luwak, which is acat-like animal. Sounds crazy but people always make the long trek to taste this coffee. It's also the most expensive coffee in the world. Doo Doo.Coffee.Yum. Down your throat. Expensive. (that sums up this paragraph)

Dayka Robinson Bali Black Woman Solo International Black Woman Travel Ubud Incheon Seoul Korea 2016

Seoul, Korea--my layover that was long enough to take in some tours!

Dayka Robinson Bali Solo Travel Ubud 2016-3

My first time EVER in a waterfall. I wanted to strip down to my birthday suit and frolic with my man in the water but I don't have a man....and it was NOT the place to be naked, so none of those dreams happened. This spot was great but OMG, that climb back up the mountain was no joke. I thought I was gonna have an asthma attack....and I don't even have asthma.

Dayka Robinson Bali Solo Travel Ubud 2016-6

Dayka Robinson Bali Solo Travel Ubud 2016-5

I love going to the international grocery stores and seeing the different foods that are on the shelf. Lays is apparently sleeping on us in the US because they have a MILLION flavors of potato chips that they don't have here. Salmon Teriyaki! Grilled Paprika Chicken! Nori Seaweed! I'm not a Lay's potato chip person but I had to try the Salmon Teriyaki and it wasn't bad (tasted a bit like seaweed paper to me).

Dayka Robinson Bali Solo Travel Ubud 2016-8

My kismet connection from Big Lots!

Dayka Robinson Bali Black Woman Solo International Black Woman Travel Ubud Incheon Seoul Korea-2 2016

More from Seoul, Korea.

Are you familiar with Air BNB? If not, you should be. It's one of my favorite sites to use for booking my accommodations when I travel...even in the US! Leave your email in the comments if you'd like me to send you an invite--you'll be glad you checked it out!

22 DAYS.

22.

Alone that number doesn't mean much but in context, it represents a huge milestone in my life, because it's the amount of vacation days I took this year. 

Yup. Twenty. Two. Days. Of. Vacation. (shut up!!!!)

And I'm talking for real vacation, not that stay at home thing. That's basically a whole month of vacation, doing, living & moving as I want to. And it may not seem like a big deal to you but here's what it means to me: that the girl who graduated college not knowing what she wanted to do, bounced around from job to job, decided to follow a curiosity for which there really wasn't a path, built her own business while often feeling around in the dark, hit some personal speed bumps, and questioned whether she was doing the right thing but kept showing up--on her own terms--anyhow, can create a life where she gets 22 days of vacation in one year, then I'm pretty sure that you can do it too. I promise we're not that different.

So in the spirit of honesty, I looked back at my 2015 post written as my 2016 self and you'll see that I specifically said I was doing more traveling AND going on more vacations this year so it's not like I didn't claim it. But even then, I didn't really believe that it was possible likethis, for me. Sure everyone talks about taking "real vacations" and where they would go if they could but the reality is, we Americans tend to use our vacation days for things like handling important personal business, sick days or intermittent 3-day weekends. Not for taking care of self. As the year started progressing and Istanbul became a possibility, I said over & over that I wanted to spend more time traveling and once I did, it seemed like everywhere I looked I was being shown how possible it was. I started receiving newsletters with flight deals and following sites like Travel Noire that ramped up my desire. You've already read the story but my ticket to Istanbul? I found that deal in the wee hours of the morning after checking one of those sites on a whim. Next thing you know, I was across the world having the time of my life for a fraction of what it could've cost me with a group. BAM.

But let me not make this post about the deals.What I want to share (and celebrate) is this milestone of mine in the context of what it means to be an entrepreneur, self-employed, and to have the luxury of almost one month of vacation. There were times in these past 5 years when I didn't know how I would make it financially. When I wasn't sure what I was doing in my business. When my house seemed more like an albatross around my neck than my perfect refuge from the world. When I was all panicky like, "OMG, am I ever gonna go on vacation again??". And then all of the sudden I look up and here's 2015, dangling weeks of vacation in my face like "Heyyyyy girl, c'mon...". And you know what? These vacation days were actually work days for me (stay with me here). Not in the rolling-my-eyes-cause-I-don't-wanna-do-this kinda work but the who-I-am-and-what-I-do-are-so-in-alignment-that-work-is-my-life way. Traveling has given me content (substance). It's allowed me to not only connect with fellow travelers & people I met along my journey, but to connect with my tribe (that's YOU) in a deeper way. To expand my life and encourage you to expand yours, too. And that's really the work I want to be doing.

Pardon my brag moment but I'm pretty damn proud of this!! It's a reminder that when all of the ups & downs are weighed, I've had a better life taking a chance on me than I ever had as a 9-5 employee. There are new dreams on the horizon now + new fires burning and it helps to be reminded that I've already done so much more on my own than I ever did chained to a standard office job. And you know what else? The things I most desire are truly desiring me--just not in the way or time that I think they should. I wrote that post in January and effectively forgot about it after the first quarter. But that international vacation & those passport stamps I mentioned?They were hunting me down even in my "forgetfulness". 

So I think I've got the hang of this thing now.

Next year I'm claiming more than double which may sound crazy to you but....watch it happen.

22 days in 2015.I'm geeked. 

AMERICA BY AMTRAK: MY CALIFORNIA ZEPHYR CROSS COUNTRY EXPERIENCE

It takes a certain kind of person to want to travel cross country by train.

There are some places you'll go, people you'll meet and things you'll see that will awaken you to the fact that you're far from home (perspectives differ greatly across this country)...and yet remind you that this vast country IS your home. You'll get to ride through a million little Heartland towns--ones you'd probably miss if you routed yourself cross country in a car. But most importantly, there's all the time you'll have to simply relax. Be rocked to sleep by the train as it runs across the rails. Cozy up with a book you've been meaning to read. Watch a movie. Stretch your legs. And just be alone in your thoughts. In comfort. Huge reclining seats with elevated footrests (and I mean reclining, not like that 2 degree airplane recline). Window curtains for the sleepy hours. Comfy lounge chairs, end tables & dining tables in the Observation Car for the times when you wanna just hang out. Food on demand (for a fee). I mean, seriously--what's not to love about riding the rails??! Long distance train travel definitely isn't for the "I-wanna-hurry-up-and-get-there" crowd--riding Amtrak is all about creating a deliberate experience though new meeting people, engaging in wide-ranging conversations, and enjoying a slower/less hectic pace of travel. And if you're into that kinda thing, then I'm telling you--you need to book yourself a ticket in 2016.

Dayka Robinson Amtrak California Zephyr 2015

IMG_9737

Dayka Robinson Amtrak California Zephyr 2015 Colorado

So first things first: Amtrak. My adventure was fantastic--everything I hoped it would be (except longer!)! I flew up to Washington D.C. the day prior to my departure and then traveled from DC to Chicago on the Capitol Limited (via Coach, since I couldn't justify paying an additional $300 for a 15 hour ride). I did some research before I left & learned that Amtrak runs the A/C year-round in each car so it can get chilly at night....and if there's one thing I really don't like it's being cold while I slumber, so I came prepared with a plush throw blanket + pillow packed in my carry on. It was by no means freezing, but I wouldn't have wanted to be without my goodies, either. :-) When I arrived in Chicago the next morning, I decided to make the most of of my 5.5 hour layover by checking my luggage & exploring the city. In DC I'd originally planned to visit the new Smithsonian National Museum of African American History & Culture but didn't get the memo that the Grand Opening isn't until February 2016. As luck would have it, while reading Ebony on the plane ride over I ran across an ad for an exhibit on David Adjaye at the Art Institute of Chicago. David is actually the architect of the new Smithsonian museum (Adjaye Associates) so it made for a perfect plan--I'd make a beeline for the museum once I was settled and see as much as possible. I checked my luggage, did a quick walking tour of the city, then headed for the Art Institute when it opened.

Dayka Robinson, Art Institute of Chicago 2015

Dayka Robinson David Adjaye Smithsonian National Museum African American History, Art Institute of Chicago 2015

(A model of the actual Smithsonian museum)

Dayka Robinson David Adjaye exhibit, Art Institute Chicago 12:2015

Seeing the notes, sketches, renderings & models of David's projects over the last 15 years was an incredibly in-depth way to learn about his work. I was bummed about missing the museum in DC but as a creative--having the opportunity to intimately explore the process of a fellow creative is priceless! And this unexpected experience is one of the things I love about traveling solo & leaving wiggle room in your plans--you can always find a way to take advantage of your layovers and get out to see something new! If you travel with an open mind, the journey will always lead to an adventure . I never would've known this much about his body of work had I missed the exhibit so it was definitely time well spent! I ended my Chicago tour with some deep dish pizza (not a fan!) and then Uber'd back to the station just in time for my next departure.

Amtrak California Zephyr Roomette 2015

(Two seats facing each other that turn into a bed at night + an upper bunk for a second traveler, extra gear, etc. Your Amtrak attendant will make your bed every night around 8-9pm!)

Dayka Robinson Amtrak California Zephyr 2015

Dayka Robinson Amtrak California Zephyr 2015-2

Once I boarded the California Zephyr in Chicago I settled into my Sleeper Car and was introduced to Al, my Sleeping Car Attendant, who provided service all the way to California. Traveling by train isn't the standard mode of travel anymore and I'm so glad I did it with my own room. Private quarters, separate bathrooms, showers, individual temperature controls,  breakfast, lunch & dinner in the dining car included (omg, I ate like they were forcing me to!), meal service in your room (if you so choose)--everything was covered. Going First Class isn't cheap but let me tell you, it's worth your pennies for the longer rides! I sat in my Roomette as the train pulled away from the station and seriously felt giddy (which is a word I rarely use). I felt like a boss for pulling this trip off, not because it was so "difficult" but because one day I decided to fulfill a dream of riding the train cross country & a few weeks later I booked myself a ticket and did it! Traveling to Istanbul opened my eyes to how much there is to experience in this world & how easy it is to make travel a priority and I promise--since I've awakened to that fact (and made a decision to GO!), opportunities are coming at every turn. The last few months have been hectic & filled with work and I'm learning that I don't function well with stress, so this trip was just the break that I needed. I loved sitting in the Observation Car late at night with my blanket, reading in the silence and lying in bed, watching Colorado fly by, felt like I was being transported back in time (Al would joke with me, "Are you gonna get up??" LMAO).  The people that I met (those whose names I remember!) each defined specific sections on my trip--Dr. Larry in Iowa, Danny from Chicago, Najla & Michael from San Francisco, Adam in Colorado, the ticket agent in Grand Junction. And you know what I talked about with these people? Deep stuff, like taking care of your money so your money takes care of you. Medical school. God. Religion. Marriage. Blended families. Amtrak. Politics. Freighthopping. Choosing not to have children. They all let me into their lives in intimate ways that you can only do with strangers and they're the kinda connections I live for.

Dayka Amtrak California Zephyr Observation Car

When the train pulled into Reno I decided to jump off to surprise my BFF, stay the night and catch the next train out the following day. I ended the Zephyr in Sacramento (spent my layover at the California State Railroad Museum which was the perfect use of time) then rode a different train down to Fresno, where I grew up, for what was supposed to be a one night layover (more on that later). If I have any complaints about my trip it was that it wasn't long enough. I was constantly torn between hanging out in the Observation Car meeting people vs lying in bed & reading so an additional day on my trip would've been perfect. Would I do it again? Absolutely, except next time I'd go from New York to San Francisco, New Orleans to Montreal or San Diego to Vancouver. You can say I'm addicted, partly because I love the train and partly because this kind of travel just changes who you are. Once you've traveled somewhere new--especially when you're doing something that stretches you beyond your comfort zone--you can NEVER go back to being who you were when you left.  Completing this trip gave me the courage to book one of my dream trips....you're gonna die when you find out where I'm going next.

Until then, I took a few of my 67 videos (LOL) and made them into a little montage of my trip. Click below to see!

HOW I BECAME AN INTERIOR DESIGNER (& why awful jobs can be good for you): PART II

I'm finally detailing my journey to becoming an Interior Designer through the careers I've attempted and the lessons I've learned along the way. Click here to readPart I of How I Became an Interior Designer

LESSON #4: PLAY TO YOUR STRENGHTS

Here was the problem with Real Estate--I didn't like to hard sell people on anything. Buying a home is a big investment and my thought was if you want it, you should buy it. You should NOT buy a home, however, because I talked you into doing so. I didn't like having to call people up and pester them about whether they or their friends wanted to buy/sell their homes in 7 days--it actually made me uncomfortable, partly because there was too much small talk involved (I don't really do small talk). I tend to be a pretty decisive person, so working with clients who were incredibly indecisive didn't feel empowering....it just felt like an energy suck. It was Divine Guidance that those I-know-what-I-want-and-I'm-ready-to-buy-right-now clients never came to me--I didn't sell a single house during those months at my real estate brokerage & in hindsight I'm thankful that I didn't. If I had, it definitely would've encouraged me to "try harder" to make that job work instead of moving towards something better. One of my strengths was my confidence & passion about the things I believed in but I found that I was neither confident nor passionate about selling real estate. So instead of trying to strengthen one of my "weaknesses"...I moved in the direction of my strengths.

LESSON #5: PAY ATTENTION TO WHAT'S ALL AROUND YOU

Which brought me back to my house. By now, renovations on my 1984 fixer upper were in full swing. Prior to moving in I'd repainted the interior (which was originally pink!), removed all of the old carpet and updated the entire first floor with bamboo flooring to get the place in livable shape. Having purchased a house with SO many projects to complete I religiously read design & renovation magazines to get inspiration for my projects and devoured them like wildfire. Even though money was tight, working on my house became a mini obsession.

Late one night I stumbled across a blog and...itessentially changed my life. It was 2009 and I'd never seen a blog before (didn't even know what one was!), but I stayed up all night reading page after page of decorating & lifestyle posts. And then I clicked on a link and found another person sharing about her life & DIY projects and I.was.hooked. What was this fascinating little online world where people built community by sharing the details of their lives??! After a few weeks of spending countless hours a day reading blogs I started thinking that maybe I could do it, too. I wasn't sure that anyone would read what I had to say but I still figured, "Why not??". I reserved a name on blogspot.com (Meditations on Life & Style--which I thought was VERY cool at the time) and on May 28, 2009 I wrote my very first blog post (read it here). When I started blogging I wasn't sure what I was going to write about...but I kept going anyhow. I took advantage of all the extra space in my new house & went back to refinishing furniture as I had done in my first apartment. One day I decided to start sharing those DIY refinishing projects on my blog and it took off. As my refinishing skills increased I started selling my furniture online (Craigslist, Etsy & later, One Kings Lane) and then readers started emailing me & asking for design help. By November 2010--only 18 months after penning my first blogpost--I officially launched Dayka Robinson Designs and the rest, as they say, is (documented) history.

So as you can see, my path to Interior Design was far from straight. I "tried on a lot of hats" before I found something that fit and during those years I felt a ton of confusion, frustration & despair at my "inability" to find my way. Let me clearly acknowledge this because I don't think enough of us do: it sucks not having something to pour your heart into especially when that's the one thing you want most in the world (and I don't mean someone). So many of us are raised to "just get a respectable job" and when you couple that with the desire to do basic, normal things like live independently, own a car, treat yourself to a nice dinner and pay your bills on time, the pressure to settle for the first job offering a little bit of money is REAL...even though you know you're gonna suffocate. This road (following your heart) isn't the easiest road because much of the path is built as you walk it & no two paths look exactly the same. It is, however, the most rewarding by far. And when you have the courage to walk away from jobs (situations/people) that don't fit & continue seeking out your next true thing, you'll look back and find that you've gained an intangible education that money couldn't buy. All of those "awful jobs"?? If you keep going you'll eventually find that they all played in your favor because each one taught you something valuable about yourself or confirmed with all certainty what not to do. And even the perceived "setbacks" are a step forward--this game is a marathon, not a sprint.

In my years of searching I learned that: (1) How I feel about the work I do matters. (2) Working in a supportive environment is important. (3) If it ain't right, it ain't right. (4) Play to my strengths and (5) Pay attention to what's all around me. And you know what? Today these lessons are are as true as they ever were. They served me years ago to help find my way to interior design and now they're helping me to create an even larger vision--a holistic business that I'm incredibly proud of and excited for. 7 years ago I NEVER IN A MILLION YEARS would've predicted I'd be a successful Interior Designer....and yet by Grace, here I am. I say this all of the time but only because I believe it so deeply: whatever is calling you, run towards it as if your life depended on it. Because it does.

It's your road and yours alone. Others may walk it with you but no one can walk it for you.(Rumi)

Click here to read Part I of my journey

image via Hilary Maloney

HOW I BECAME AN INTERIOR DESIGNER (& why awful jobs can be good for you): PART I

NEWSFLASH: I was just your average college student. I'm a proud Spelman Woman but I didn't really showcase my aptitude in school (though I had a great time!). I remember graduating and feeling a bit of a panic, not knowing "what I was going to do with my life" because I hadn't followed a traditional path. While most everyone I knew spent their summers in great internships or studying abroad, I was home & hanging out with friends, working at Outback Steakhouse--far removed from cool companies or groundbreaking research. After graduating a little behind schedule, I started working for Kroger corporate and found myself smack dab in the middle of job purgatory. My California experience was great but upon transferring to Atlanta & approaching the 1 year mark, quickly it became a job that sucked the life out of me. Three of us worked in a teeny tiny office on the second floor of a warehouse made of cinder blocks with zero exterior windows. Each desk faced a wall. I remember I used to dread Saturdays because it meant that the next night I'd have to get ready to go right back to work (and you know your job sucks when you're dreading Saturday nights). When my manager pulled me aside one day to tell me that I "needed to stop talking about my upcoming graduation around the office because it was flaunting it in the face of everyone else who didn't have a degree" (people who were all at least 15 years older than me), I knew it was time to go and I did.

In hindsight, there were some great things about that job though. Not only did it get me back to  Atlanta (and cover some of my tuition) but I also got to know some really great guys who worked in the grocery/freezer warehouses on the facility. Guys that, after my having only worked there a few months, banded together to help me move into my new furniture-less apartment. And since I was determined to make that house a home, I spent the weekend before & after my move scouring thrift stores for gently loved furniture and casegoods that I could refinish & re-love. I had no idea at the time that this "thrifting phase" would play such a huge role in my life as I moved forward. I tried to hold out at that job as long as I could but around the 1 year mark I decided that it was time to go.  Before I left I'd started thinking a lot about what I could do/wanted to do next and I knew I wanted something that would be interesting & exciting with a lot more freedom. Hair & beauty was the thing that I was into at the time and it was seemed like a really fun and creative career so you know what? I bit the bullet and enrolled in hair school.

Lesson # 1: HOW YOU FEEL ABOUT THE WORK YOU DO MATTERS.

Lesson #2: WORKING IN A SUPPORTIVE ENVIROMENT IS IMPORTANT.

Let me tell you what I loved about hair school:that I could be myself. For the first time in my life I found myself in an environment where the most successful people I knew were actually making money by being themselves. Wild hair? Cool. Tattoos? Fabulous. Piercings in your lip? No one cared. Hair school wasn't about how you dressed or what college you went to but solely about skill. There were some things I didn't take to (strict rules & set schedule), but what really made me feel free was the creative aspect of it all--the environment was charged with an energy of creativity.  It's the first place I learned that if you carry yourself like an expert, people will believe you're one. Having a creative outlet & being able to wear what I wanted were things that I loved....but after logging hundreds of hours learning the technicaI skills, it became apparent that I really didn't want to stand up and "do hair" all of my life after all. My feet were sore from standing all day, I wasn't that great at small talk and I didn't want to discuss the finer points of pop culture day in & day out (clearly all stylists don't experience this but I believe it was my experience because I wasn't supposed to be there). After working in a salon for a few months I realized that I was more suited to be a salon manager than a stylist (another clue!), but even that wasn't something that I wanted to pursue with reckless abandon. So once I completed my hours to graduate, I just stopped trying to force it. I didn't think I was good enough to be a stylist...but it wasn't my self-critical nature that turned me away: I simply didn't have a passion for the job. I caught some flack and felt ashamed that I'd "wasted" that money but it just wasn't going to be a good fit in the long run. I never took the State Boards to become a licensed cosmetologist or anything, I just stopped....and never looked back.

LESSON #3: IF IT AIN'T RIGHT....IT AIN'T RIGHT. 

While I was working at the salon, my lease was ending and my father suggested I start looking for a home to purchase. I knew early on that I was looking for something that I could put my own stamp on--change the flooring here, mini bathroom renovation there.I liked the satisfaction that came with getting my hands a bit dirty and missed having an open space where I could paint & refinish thrift store furniture to my liking. I would search the home listings on my own, drive past the properties I liked and then send my realtor a final list of the homes I wanted to see inside of. We did that until I landed on a house I thought could be perfect and I promptly put in an offer, closed the deal and became a homeowner (2006). Closing on my house marked the end of my salon days but the beginning of a new career--Real Estate. It seemed like a shame to let everything I'd learned in my home buying process go to waste and I really liked looking at houses so I thought, "I could make a pretty good real estate agent".

I was a lot like Little Red Riding Hood in those days, desperately trying to find something that fit so I could have a career I could take pride in. Something where I'd feel stimulated, excited & engaged with work that I'd be proud to share with my friends & family. I simply refused to spend the majority of my waking hours endlessly complaining about a job. The thought of being miserable for 40 hours/week had me crying myself to sleep some nights because finding meaningful work was turning out to be harder than I'd thought.

CLICK HERE FOR PART TWO

HOW I TRAVELED TO ISTANBUL & PARIS ON $2000

8 days in Europe for around $2000??  It's absolutely possible and actually quite easy! My entire trip cost me under $2000 (I still have about 80 Euro in my wallet!) and is by far, one of the best investments I've ever made in myself. Here's what my trip actually cost:

Airfare $790. Istanbul accommodations $357. Culinary Tour $125. Paris Accommodations $150. Gifts $250. Entrance fees, books, jewelry, spices/teas/soaps, coat, personal                       items $270. Food $150. Transportation $139.Total $2231. (*yes it's over $2k but since the gifts weren't a necessity, this is doable for under $2k)

Here's what I did:

1. Stayed flexible. I knew I wanted to go in August since I'd originally planned to go with the group around the same time, but I wasn't set on any dates. When searching for the best flight deals, the key is to be flexible. If you're tied to specific months/flight times, it might be better to bite the bullet and pay for a regular ticket because the chances of finding exactly what you want at a price you can handle may be slim. Staying open--and allowing your plans to change accordingly--will grant you access to the best deals.

2. Used resources that were already available. There's really no need to reinvent the wheel because there are already TONS of sites across the web dedicated to travel deals--use them! My absolute favorite is Travel Noire through which I've found quite a few websites that can help you score a deal. One such site is The Flight Deal where I found my ticket at the beginning of July for my August departure. With taxes/fees plus the additional travel insurance I purchased (ALWAYS get travel insurance...don't skimp here!), my ticket came to $790 which is almost HALF OFF of what I'd found on my own. The ticket had been running around $1500 for months. The Flight Deal requires you to use ITA software matrix to get the codes for the best deals (you'll need to follow the directions as listed on The Flight Deal) but it's not that difficult & absolutely worth the time it takes to lock in the best deal. My ticket was booked through Priceline and I flew Delta which also allowed me to accumulate Skymiles for my trip, so my vacation is helping me earn a free ticket to go somewhere else, too. And sidetone: don't think you need to be 6 weeks out from departure to find a great deal--the earliest availability was actually for the end of July, but I couldn't make that itinerary work with my schedule.

3. Booked my accommodations through Air BNB.I am OBSESSED with this site! I'd heard of it for years but didn't use it until my trip to NYC last year when I wanted to stay on my own in the city, versus with friends/family. I immediately fell in love. If you love staying in a place that feels a little more like home, having access to personal restaurant/tourist recommendations from your host, and living in a neighborhood that gives you a more intimate experience of your destination, then Air BNB is right for you. You can share a space, rent a room or an entire home--whatever your preference according to what you'd like to spend! I've used this service 3 times now and I only rent an entire home when I travel since I don't want to think about coming in/out with another person there. I also pick my accommodations according to the number of reviews a listing has & only book places with a MINIMUM of (10) 5 star reviews.  Depending on your destination, the accommodations can be incredibly inexpensive, too.  I found this place in Istanbul which was close to Taksim Square, Galata Bridge, the Old City & Istikal Street for only $47/night. Yup, you read that right--$47/night, and since Istanbul sees a ton of tourist traffic in August, that's actually the high season rate (rates go as low as $37). Was my budget limited to $50/night? No--but it's great to know that traveling on a smaller budget is totally possible to do here. I did look at a few more expensive places but when I realized it was possible to get a nice place at a much better rate, it just didn't make sense to pay $200/night for an apartment I'd spend little time in. Again, my intention is to invest in experiences. ;-) In the end, this studio apartment was absolutely the right choice for me. Onat, the host, had 85 stellar reviews for this apartment (and 510 in total!) from people all across the world which sealed the deal for me and after having stayed there, I'm so glad I did. He gave me exact directions to where I wanted to go. Told me about a few restaurants off the beaten path that locals loved.  As an added bonus, he owns a cafe right next door to the apartment so we spent a lot of time talking during my trip & became very good friends!  My tips for Air BNB? Book early if you can (I didn't, but it will ensure the best availability). Complete your profile and let the host know what's bringing you to their city (keep in mind that you're a stranger to them!). Take time to scour the reviews and if people say a place doesn't need air condition, pay attention to whether they're from the US or not, as standards of living vary across the world. Make sure your host has a 100% response rate. Look for hosts that go above & beyond (this depends on your needs but since I was traveling alone in a foreign country, I needed someone who was available 24/7. Onat was perfect!). Keep in mind that the neighborhoods may be very different than what you're used to back home but just because they're old doesn't mean they're dangerous.

4. Utilize Trip Advisor. Another site I live by, even when I travel in the States. I love sites with user reviews and for travel, this one is probably the best out there. I found Turkish Flavours, the company that led my culinary tour, through Trip Advisor and they did NOT disappoint--there's a reason they're # 1! If you're wanting to know about restaurants, top tourist sites, cruises, etc., definitely peruse Trip Advisor for the traveler tips/reviews of your destination. As I've previously mentioned, that $125 was some of the best money I've spent on a tour and really gave me a wider understanding of Turkish culture. I'd originally planned to do a tour of the historic sites but as the days went on I felt more comfortable navigating the city/transit system and decided to just tackle them on my own. Instead, I hired a taxi driver to drive me around the city for a little over an hour and we went into areas I never would've seen on my own, which cost me about $30 USD. Definitely worth the money.
5. Consider the exchange rate. I didn't research it at all before I settled on a destination but part of the reason my trip was such a steal was because the USD to Turkish Lira (TL) exchange rate is awesome right now. $1 USD=2.8 TL, so as you can imagine, my money went far! Charlene, the Spelman woman that I met in Istanbul (see my Instagram post) said I kept cracking her up as we walked the Grand Bazaar because I kept whipping out my phone anytime someone started naming prices so I'd know how to negotiate. I kept having to remind myself, "150TL is only $53 USD Dayka--that's a deal!". So if you want to really stretch your trip, go somewhere where the USD will go far. For me, Turkey couldn't have been a better destination. The Euro in Paris is actually stronger than the USD so your money won't go quite as far there. But that doesn't mean you shouldn't go.
6. Be intentional about what you really need. A key part of trip planning for me--or embarking on anything new that I really want--is to set my intentions about who I want to be/how I want to show up/what I want to do/how I want to feel in the midst of my experience. Since I'm in a phase where I'm currently decluttering my belongings and getting rid of a ton of stuff to really live with the things I love, I also made an intention about my vacation purchases as well. Did I see lots of cool things that I could've brought back a souvenirs? Most definitely. But I really don't need a miniature statue of the Hagia Sofia, post cards from the Blue Mosque or keychains that say "Istikal"....they aren't things I would ever display in my home so I kept asking myself, "How are you going to use that? Where are you going to put that?". Instead of wasting money on things I'd never use once I got home, I invested in things I love and actually would use like fresh spices & teas from the Spice Market, a lot of of beautiful Bronze jewelry, a few 100% olive oil soaps and some Pink Himalayan Salt Bars which I was introduced to on my trip. So being mindful about what you really need and how you want to remember your trip will drastically cut down on your expenses. Don't just buy something to bring it home so you can tell people you bought it in Turkey. You don't NEED to buy a pair of shoes in Paris.

7. Use cash. I left the US with $300 dollars and used an ATM twice while in Turkey to get 1,000 TL  out each time ($357 USD) so I had a total of $1,014 during my trip. The only time I used my card while I was gone was at the ATM and to purchase tickets for the train in Paris. Other than that, cash was king. This helped me to keep a watchful eye on my expenditures and ensured that I always had sufficient cash on hand to hail a taxi in a moment's notice (I didn't notice any taxi's accepting debit cards). I used this money throughout Istanbul & Paris (though I did lose some money when I had to exchange the TL to Euros). In general, I think having cash just makes it easier to get around but then there's also this: at one very small, local kebob shop in Istanbul, I saw a British man going back & forth with the owners because his debit card had been overcharged and due to the language barrier, no one really understood each other. Because they couldn't get on the same page, he eventually just gave up and left but I wondered how often that happens when you try to use a debit card in a foreign country.  Had he used cash, he could've been sure of the total amount upfront & avoided this situation all together.

8. Selected a flight with a stopover. So the Paris portion of my trip was actually a 24 hour stopover, but there was no extra fee for the extended layover--because of the flight I selected it was included in the original $790 fee. Taking advantage of this stopover gave me an opportunity to have a full day/night in a second European city (Paris, at that!) en route back to Atlanta. When you're selecting your flight, make sure you look at ALL of the flight options and try to get something with at least an 8 hour layover, which will give you time to leave the airport, do a bit of sightseeing, and get back through customs in time for your flight home. I found my 24 hour layover in one of the flights at the bottom of a very long list and I had I not looked at every singe option closely, I would've missed out on this "free" second location.  Since I would've paid $790 with or without the Paris stop, it was a no brainer and ended up being the perfect way to wrap up my trip. My Atlanta girlfriend took the train in from her London vacation and we had a delicious breakfast at a local cafe, peeked in the Luxembourg Gardens, saw the Eiffel tower, walked the Seine, saw the Louvre, took a 1 hour boat cruise, and ended our night eating Japanese food at one place and then sharing 5 (5!!) deserts at our original breakfast spot. We headed back to the room stuffed & exhausted, then the next morning I hopped a train back to CDG for my flight to Atlanta. I don't know if I could've done 24 hours in Paris better.

So now you see, $2000 is totally possible! I don't profess to be a solo travel expert but.....I sure hope to become one soon. If you're thinking about embarking on a trip of your own & need encouragement or simply want to know more details about my trip to Istanbul, please leave a comment below!